Where Do Kids Learn Mean?

I am totally surprised how a child of 6 years of age can learn to be so mean?

Leilani is the type of child that befriends people very easily. I guess she takes after her Mom, LOL. And like her mom she also seems to draw the attention of not so nice people too. Of course at her age it is a little difficult for her to weed out the bad apples from the bunch. Heck, it took me till the age of 32 to master the weeding, even though I do occasionally have a lapse in judgement.

Last year, a new 1st grader joined her bus. Leilani being the sweetie that she is, decided to sit next to her and befriend her. She made the little girls transition from going on the bus with only kids her age, to going on a bus with kids much older than her so much easier. The little girls mom mentioned to me how nervous her daughter was about going to school with the big kids on the bus, and how Leilani soothed those fears by her sitting next to her and chatting with her.

Some of Leilani's Girl Scout friends are also on the bus. Being thier scout leader I speak to their mom's on a regular basis. One mom asked me how is "K" with Leilani. I told her I suppose fine since I haven't heard Leilani complain. She then goes on to tell me that this little girl torments 3 girls on the bus by telling them that they are stupid and evil and shaking her finger on them and telling them that because she did that to them they are going to die.

HUH! I couldn't believe a child this young is already bullying other kids on the bus. I broached the topic with Leilani carefully while we were out running errands one weekend. I asked her if "K" is mean to anyone. She said yes, she is says not so nice things to her Girl Scout friends. She also stated that she told her that isn't nice to say, and she seemed to have calmed down.

Then Friday, Leilani comes home with one of those fortune teller games that you make out of folding a piece of paper (I remember making them in grade school). She said "K" made it for her. Then she added, "But Mom, she wrote some not nice things in it. I crossed them out and wrote my own". I asked if I may see it and sure enough the paper was riddled with fortunes as "You're going to Die", "You are Stupid", and other mean things. I was appalled!

Then yesterday....Leilani gets off the bus on the verge of tears. I ask what's wrong and she goes on to say that "K" and an older girl Sabrina have been going at it with each other. Sabrina decided to bring Leilani into the mix and was passing notes on the bus to "K" saying that Leilani wrote it to her. Fortunately Sabrina doesn't know how to spell Lei's name and when "K" asked her if she wrote it she said no. But Leilani is starting to get pulled into the negativity of "K".

I told Leilani to change her seat. She should sit with her Girl Scout buddies. I don't want "K" to start her torment on Leilani. I let her know it is OK to not sit with her anymore if she feels that she is a troublemaker. She isn't being mean by changing her seat. She is avoiding problems.

It is so sad that children so young can be so mean.